To piggyback off Inky’s question, I’m curious why you proposed friends with benefits versus a romantic relationship? I personally would be confused if someone I was interested in suggested that – it seems to put restrictions on the relationship, a way of saying “I am attracted to you and I like you, but it’s just going to be sex among friends”. Given that he was in a (presumably) monogamous relationship for 10 years, I would suspect it’s not his “style” to have sex outside of a relationship. Is that what you want?