Dear Csaba

You must be really hurting having all that anger inside you. You are not a terrible person Csaba. You are questioning your thoughts.
You say “What is wrong with me?” “What have i become?” Only a kind-hearted person would bother having these thoughts. A kind hearted person suffering from exhaustion perhaps…

Maybe you gave all your love to the world, again and again, getting little in return, or not love in forms and results you expected it to be.

Did you ever tell your story, share your feelings with someone? Or was it always one way affection you experienced? Did you expect people will listen to your problems because you listened to their problems? Because in reality to get help you should ask for help. Unfortunately people can’t guess if we are in pain. Fortunately if we are in pain and let it be known, people respond.

Csaba i am really, really sorry, for the bad emotions boiling up inside you. More important than listening to yourself, is someone else listening to you!

You have every right to go to that gym and work out 4 times a week and no one should try and bother you while you recharge your batteries. No one!

It is normal to overreact. Your emotions took hold of you because you haven’t payed any attention to them!
A boiling kettle to return to normal temperature must be cooled again. A safe way to cool down is to speak to someone you think will listen. Is there anyone that you think will listen to you if you ask them to?

Also try spendind time with yourself. Doing things you enjoy truly. Grab a bicycle and tour the city! Draw a painting, take pictures, do meditation, try mindfullness videos on youtube.They were suggested to me, and helped me calm down in a time of need. Also, hang out with people that don’t drain your energy!

I hope this helped a little, fellow tinybuddhits may be more helpfull.

Take care of yourself, you deserve it!
George

• This reply was modified 9 years, 9 months ago by George.