Thank you Inky,
Thank you for the nerves to read (I know it’s a lot of text) and respond.
My problem is that I’m left with all this love in my chest and all this pain at the same time and I don’t know how to move on. How to let go of the feelings I still have for him. How to let go of the memories of what we were at the beginning and how to let go of all the hopes for a future with him.
I’m devastated to that level where I don’t see a point of life if it’s not with him.
I don’t want to move on. I want him to get a slap in the face and wake up and realize what is going on and make things right.
I know it sounds like “Lala Land” and actually is and this is my problem. I can’t seem to be able to gather forces and let go, move on.

Blessings to you,
I.