Chaycups,

In addition to the other kindly advice, consider that sometimes we have to give up the chase, sit down, and relax. When we become overwhelmed, often we get a feeling like we need to fix it. But when we’re overwhelmed, we are not in a good place to fix anything. Much like its difficult to see the sun on a rainy day, its not easy to shine the light of our inspiration when we’re feeling emotionally compacted.

Instead, what we can do is work to open up the space around the emotions. Shame, for instance, feeling isolated, can push us to try to become more worthy of connection. Looking for a golden key, some kind of right thing to say or do that makes us worth connecting with. Instead of seeking that golden key, we can sit, breathe, relax with our senses, and accept that no mistakes can disconnect us, no noble actions can connect us. We just are connected. Said differently, love is unconditional, so nothing you can do will make you more or less lovable. You’re stuck, unavoidably, permantenly lovable no matter what you do. So relax! That’s when you can look around, grab a bucket of paint and a paintbrush, and repaint your canvas in whatever hues you find lovely.

Consider reading some of Brene Brown’s work. She’s studied shame extensively, and is quite a beautiful spirit, helpful.

With warmth,
Matt