Dear strong2015:

You wrote that he said: “I’m easy, have dinner with your friends if you want.” and something like: if you met the love of your life I wouldn’t begrudge you for choosing someone else over me.

What do these statements mean? Need to take them in context of other statements and behaviors. What came to my mind reading these two statements is that he may feel guilty, that he feels he is not good enough for you and he feels badly for keeping you from meeting someone who is better than him. Thses are things I can imagine myself saying in the past for the reasons I stated.

The awkwardness on his part when intimate may fit with him feeling guilty, inadequate, maybe even defected.

These are all possibilities to consider perhaps? My suggestion is to … never underestimate how many, many people out there feel not-good-enough. I missed this fact because I felt not good enough and from that point of view thought everyone else had it all together. Not so.

I hope you can practice good communication skills with him and that he does too so you can communicate honestly, openly, like best friends first, before anything else. If he can feel safe with you wanting the best for him and where you can feel the same with him.

anita