Dear daniela2404:

If you are looking for something wrong that you did, i see one thing and that is that you were not honest with yourself and with him. You communicated to him that you are a non-being in this, that he is the only person that mattered, the only person with challenges in his life. In truth you matter, you have challenges (you listed a few), your needs and feelings are important just as much as his.

I would say, when another person is in trouble that doesn’t mean you no longer exist, you no longer matter. You still have your needs, your valid needs, your feelings that you need to share. Once you present yourself as one that doesn’t matter or doesn’t count, then… you don’t, with most people.

Self sacrifice is often not a virtue.

In this or future relationships- make yourself matter, no matter what.

anita