Libby – I responded to your other post last night – I hope it helps. Also, I just remembered that there is a big chapter (I think chapter 3) in the New Earth by Eckhart Tolle about pain. I think it will give you a deeper understanding of why / how people behave when they’re unconscious and in the grip of ego. It may help you to understand your mom and sister’s behaviors, and also maybe your own reactions.

Whether you’re aware of it or not, you stepped on your spiritual path. So start looking at the world with your new eyes – your inner eye and “Be the change you wish to see in the world.” (Gandhi)