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Overcome Fears & Work Happy: Fear to Fuel eCourse Giveaway

Update: This giveaway has ended, but I'm excited to offer you a 25% discount on the Fear to Fuel eCourse. Use code yourluckyday when you make your purchase here.

Two years ago, I was working 70 hours per week without a sense of purpose, passion, or joy. As I wrote before in my post Do, Adjust, Do: A Journey to Meaningful, Satisfying Work, I’ve held nearly 100 different jobs in my time if you count my various freelance and contract gigs.

Why I Held Off on Pursuing Meaningful Work

When I was younger, I assumed it would be easy to do whatever I wanted to do.

It’s that type of innocent arrogance that can push us to either take major risks or procrastinate, thinking everything will fall into place in that elusive someday—when we’re better prepared, better educated, or otherwise ready to finally start the things we talk about doing.

I always worked hard, but because I was too afraid to identify and go after the work that would fulfill me, for years I merely spun my wheels.

I was afraid of trying and not being good enough. I was afraid of failing. I was afraid of succeeding and not being able to maintain momentum. I was afraid people would learn that I’m a fraud—that despite writing about happiness and wisdom, I am still imperfectly human and vulnerable.

Why I Appreciate Fear

Since starting Tiny Buddha and learning as I went, one action step and mistake at a time, I have realized that fear can be a tremendous gift.

I’m not talking about the type of fear that alerts us to actual danger. I’m talking about the type of fear that shines a light on who we can be and what types of thoughts, beliefs, and habits are standing in the way.

Just like a muscle needs to tear to grow stronger, we sometimes need to break ourselves down in order to reemerge. We need to let go of who we are to become who we can be. Our fears show us where there’s work to be done. If we let them, our fears create new strengths.

I actively address many of my fears while running Tiny Buddha. Every time I open my laptop, I encourage myself to be authentic, even when my ego has a different plan. And as I am finishing my book, I remind myself to hold onto the same bravery, both when I’m writing and when I unleash my book to the world.

With this in mind, I was thrilled to meet Karl Staib a while back.

The Amazing Karl Staib

Karl Staib runs Work Happy Now, a blog aligned with his unique career coaching business. His whole angle is that we all have superpowers—or key strengths—and we can be happier and have more fun with work once we identify and leverage them.

Karl decided that instead of letting his fear bully him, it would enhance his superpowers. That’s what he does with his clients and on his blog—helps people overcome their fears and align their work with their skills and personality.

Since I am working with Karl to help hone my professional direction, he recently offered me a free copy of his new eCourse: Fear to Fuel.

Review and Giveaway!

I’ve spent the last week exploring the different sections and interviews, and I’m excited to announce that I’ve obtained two free copies to give to you!

What immediately impressed me about the course is that Karl procured interviews with an amazing selection of visionaries, including Gretchen Rubin of The Happiness Project, Ignore Everybody author Hugh McLeod, and Zappos CEO Tony Hsieh.

I had the opportunity to hear Tony speak last year, and I’ve read his book Delivering Happiness twice.

As someone who always thought of earning money and experiencing happiness as diametrically opposed, I found his perspective inspiring and even life-changing. It is possible to make money while honoring strong values and being true to yourself; and Tony exemplifies that.

The course includes 14 interviews on such topics as:

  • Embracing happiness
  • Finding your own path
  • Going all in
  • Finding productive and meaningful work
  • Discovering your motivator
  • Building a passionate website

In addition to the keynotes, the course contains a detailed guide to dealing with fear and unleashing your superpowers.

Having recently explored emotional intelligence, I particularly enjoyed the section about countering resistance. Karl highlights how our strongest emotion generally leads our thoughts and actions—whether it’s fear, anxiety, or otherwise—but we can interject at any time.

We can decide at any time to stop worrying about everything that could go wrong and instead take responsibility for what goes right.

How to Win Fear to Fuel

To enter the giveaway and potentially win access to the Fear to Fuel eCourse, valued at $99:

1. Comment below.

2. Tweet the following: RT @tinybuddha Overcome Fears–Fear to Fuel eCourse GIVEAWAY  http://bit.ly/aM476s Comment & RT to enter!

You can enter until midnight PST on Monday, November 22, 2010.

If you’d rather not wait to see if you’ll win, you can visit the Fear to Fuel site and grab a copy now. Your purchase will include 13 bonus gifts, including a number of other popular eCourses and eBooks.

Photo here

About Lori Deschene

Lori Deschene is the founder of Tiny Buddha and Recreate Your Life Story, an online course that helps you let go of the past and live a life you love. Her latest bookTiny Buddha's Gratitude Journal, which includes 15 coloring pages, is now available for purchase. For daily wisdom, follow Tiny Buddha on Twitter, Facebook & Instagram..

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  • Wendy

    I was afraid of trying and not being good enough. I was afraid of failing. I was afraid of succeeding and not being able to maintain momentum. I was afraid people would learn that I’m a fraud. . .

    I could have written that. Thanks for the info.

  • Paco

    I want to learn how to express my ideas, and free my potential

  • Sarah

    This could not come at a better time – I need help not worrying about what could go wrong in so many aspects of my life right now!

  • Beth

    This course sounds great!

  • Fiona Lundy

    This looks amazing – I hope I win! :o)

  • Linda

    I have been dealing with this issue for a while now and am in the process of resetting my goals in work, life and love. This sounds like a wonderful springboard into a brighter future.

  • Emily

    awesome post, here’s hoping I win too! ;D

  • will

    the other side of fear is FUN!

  • AmytotheO

    In my pursuit of my holistic health certificates, my continual block is fear. At 33 years old I’ve been exposed to it for quite a long time and has been the hardest thing for me to overcome. I’ve come far, but there is still something there blocking me. This is a great post. Good luck to all!

  • Crystal

    This sounds absolutely fantastic. Thanks for the terrific giveaway!

  • versterre

    Just started to follow your tweets, After divorce 3 years ago, changed my love life,but still stuck about what people might think of me and the jobchange I made. BIG rollercoaster of ‘peer’ or ‘friends’ pressure…This course couldn’t come at a better time

  • Joanne

    I’d like to win this book!

  • Desert Diva

    The course sounds great – thanks for sharing this. It’s an area that I continuously work on…

  • JenC_T

    Love your Twitter and blog posts. You’re doing great work here!

    I hope to heave the opportunity to learn about the “Fear to Fuel” eCourse and put it into practice in my own life.

    Thank you

  • Smilinsteve

    Lori,
    Your labor of Love Tiny Buddha has been a comfort to my heart, a boost of encouragement, and a thought provoking medicine to my mind….I am so grateful that a friend shared it with me, and I let others know as well…Thanks so much, I look forward to the “Fuel To Fear” book!

  • Denise :o)

    I love your post as they always seem to be right on with whats going on in my life, are you a mind reader?? ;o)
    Fear can work for us or against us, and overcoming the thoughts of “I can’t do it, I will fail, etc.” by far is one of the most difficult things in life.
    Keep up the great work and insights! THX!!

  • Pfunk

    After 32 years of marriage, I jumped into the unknown world of being single. Talk about fear…I’m still working on establishing my new life and the Fear to Fuel course could be just the thing to help me continue on my journey. I hope to have this opportunity.

  • Anonymous

    I’d love to tackle my fear blocks.

  • Maureenblomgren

    Tiny Buddha always has something that goes with exactly what is happening in my day. I thank you so much for helping me. I am a woman coming up on her 50’s and have had to start my entire life over from the bottom. It is not easy, it is scary yet it is quite freeing to not own anything like I did. Sometimes I think all the material things were just a hinderence to me achieving my dreams and spiritual goal.
    I would love to take this course but I cannot afford it. Thank you again for all you post and do.
    Namaste.

  • Juan Gray

    This is the type of knowledge and understanding that needs to be communicated to everyone.
    Good Job!

    Juancege

  • Would love to learn more about this topic. I admit that I am struggling with earning a living still being diametrically opposed to experiencing deep happiness. I trust your alliances and am sure this course is powerful.

  • The course sounds amazing — looking forward to learning more!

  • The course sounds amazing — looking forward to learning more!

  • Annie

    This would motivate me to grab ahold of my fear.I’ve been out of work a year 🙂

  • Allison9034

    Oooh, pick me. Sounds wonderful and I know I could use it to help me with all of the struggles I’ve been facing lately.

  • Sunpup63

    Yes! to this lesson.

  • Triciamerc

    Thank you.

  • Mcguire

    cool

  • sma1018

    Ha! How timely….I took today off. First time in 12 years! I love my job as a teacher and have a passion for what I do. Taking the day off has helped me rest my sore back. How most serendipitous that I came across this giveaway…. 🙂
    I connected to this…
    “Just like a muscle needs to tear to grow stronger, we sometimes need to break ourselves down in order to reemerge. We need to let go of who we are to become who we can be. Our fears show us where there’s work to be done. If we let them, our fears create new strengths.”
    Taking the time to reemerge…I like that.

  • PJ

    Great article..

  • Satori Muse

    Very timely for me as well. Thank you 🙂

  • Michelef74

    What a great concept. I’m looking into a career change and am paralyzed with fear. I could definitely use some help.

  • Love the site, keep it Lori!

  • Your blog is AMAZING! Love it and all of the stuff you put through on your FB page! I’ve already recommended both to many of my friends. I totally get the being paralyzed by fear. I used to be in the tiniest of boxes… I’ve manage to break free but I still have so far to go.

  • Connah

    I would love to win this. I’ve been struggling a lot lately, had a lot of ups and downs and need to find my time to relax and be happy. It would be nice to look at this, thankyou for the opportunity.

    http://twitter.com/#!/Conn_Platt/status/5704294514827264

  • Halley

    I tweeted @HalleyBass 🙂 This is really cool and comes at a great time while I just moved to Berkeley, CA seeking a new path and trying to discover the next step in my career. I recently did a numerology reading which said my gift is ‘teacher’ though I would never think to be a teacher. So I have to think about what it is I want to devote my life to…and then once I do it – I can teach it. Well, that’s the hope!

  • SerenitySeeker

    Great stuff!

  • As a 30-somethin’ single mama of 2 who is facing the loss of my current job due to loss of grant funding, I couldn’t have stumbled upon this website at a better moment! 🙂 ! yay! Too cool!

  • Karen

    I love the idea of examining our fears to identify our areas of resistance – something that I intend to put into my daily practice! The programme sounds fab and I look forward to hearing more about it!

  • Maldorer

    If I don’t win I may have to buy anyway.

  • RT @tatt00d3 …. There was a time in my life where I really struggled with exactly what you described. “I was afraid of trying and not being good enough. I was afraid of failing. I was afraid of succeeding and not being able to maintain momentum. I was afraid people would learn that I’m a fraud” I went through a long phase of that exact thought process towards tattooing, and as I was starting to work on getting past those fears, I was involved in a motorcycle accident that has left me paralyzed, and given me a whole new prespective on things I could have done far easier before, but put off, or was too afraid to pursue. Great post, and the ebook sounds like a good read also.

  • Thank you! I’m so glad you enjoy Tiny Buddha =)

  • Thanks Isaiah!

  • I’m so glad you have found Tiny Buddha helpful. It sounds like you have a fantastic perspective about achieving your dreams and creating a stronger sense of spirituality. I know exactly what you mean about things potentially standing in the way. Thanks for commenting Maureen!

  • Thanks Denise!

  • Hi Steve~

    Thanks for commenting. I couldn’t ask for a better piece of feedback! I love running this site, and I’m so happy to know you’ve found it helpful.

    Lori

  • Thank you Jen!

  • Dee

    I JUST saw the Fear to Fuel posted on the bottom of Tiny Buddha last night. I really really need this…. I have been dabbling with my passion (photography) and want to pursue it. I’ve been working since high school & doing the “safe” route to support myself. I never had the time to dream, never developed a real passion for anything– until recently…I need this

  • Hrmousley

    I have just started anti-anxiety medication because I am almost unable to function at work. I need this. I am drowning.

  • Izzy160

    I found Tiny Buddha in my search to figure out this aching sense of worthlessness that I call my life.Your lunchtime emails are keeping me off depression meds. Your amazing articles are helping me learn who I am. My biggest breakthrough is fear. I have discovered it is fear that has ruled me for 30 years. If you have the ability to help me understand, move past, conquer fear, I would be eternally grateful.

  • I feel like the universe is conspiring in my favor – I would love the opportuniy to receive this book free!

  • Nycpari

    Thank you for this post! I could particularly relate to thinking everything you wanted would be easy to obtain. Having just graduated college and relocating halfway across the world, I figured I would be showered with opportunities through my connections and that everything would come as easy as I had always imagined. So not the case! I’ve since been procrastinating as a result of a fear of failure, success and commitment, but this post has inspired me to take baby steps 🙂

  • Cassie Wells

    I love the insprirational thoughts that tiny Budda gives to me.

  • Levi7671

    thank you tiny buddha – i, much like all of the other readers listed below, have struggled with finding my passion. i thought it was business but have learned after a lot of thought, effort and heartache that it is only temporarily rewarding, not particularly fulfilling, and despite my expectations i do not feel any more confident in my talents or abilities….this recent revelation has left me deflated and empty and the last 10mths have been committed to finding that place & project for me in the world that makes me feel whole. its a process, and a struggle but i try every day to persevere because i believe the effort will be worth it and i am trying to teach myself that i deserve that sense of passion again. thank you for providing resources and sharing experiences that help others look beyond their fears and strive for what matters to them…nameste…

  • Tweeted (trio3works) and it looks like a great read.

  • Frannyp

    This course sounds like it could benefit my husband so much. I really enjoy your posts each day and I hope that we can have the opportunity to see what Fear to Fuel can do for us. 🙂

  • katherine

    As a divoced mom, house falling apart and working in healthcare where productivity is demanded with sick elderly people, which is like trying to stop a popsicle melting in the sun. Stress has become my best friend this past few years. Recently had a hemorrhage behind my eye; a wakeup call to change things a little. I have been sitting wondering how while on sick leave. I would like to do something different in work or in leisure but dont know what….. then I saw this… Id be willing to give it a try! 🙂

  • Power Janice5

    no words will win this except for I love you……

  • Lori, I’m sure whoever wins this will benefit greatly from your kindness. Applaud your efforts and appreciate all the kind messages and tweets you post. Metta.

  • Bessie Bug

    just trying to figure out how to balance work and life. keep overcommitting myself and getting buried under the work.

  • Michele YOung

    Looks like a great book! I’d love the opportunity to read it. Going through some major changes in my career right now and my husband is in the process of pursuing his dream of owning his own store. Many frightening changes…but I know we will be better for the challenges. I’m off to “tweet” this right now=) Good luck everyone!

  • Laura

    I could REALLY use this! I am at a point now where I feel my heart and mind are open to hearing and integrating exactly this type of message and it’s what I want to live. Good luck to everyone and thank you Lori for your amazing site.

  • Michele Young

    Just RT using muaythaimama =)

  • Kizel

    I could really use this course right now. I am 51 years old now and have always felt like a loser. I started out with such dreams…. I studied to be a concert pianist and I was brilliant in my lessons but when it came to performing, I was so afraid of making a mistake and so sensitive to others’ opinions that I nearly had a nervous breakdown and just gave up. I took up painting and everyone told me I was very talented but after the piano experience I had so little confidence in myself that I didn’t take it seriously and I just let it go. For most of my life I have suffered through a series of meaningless, menial, dead end jobs. Now I’m a librarian in a small public library, unhappy and unfulfilled and angry that I let fear rule and ruin my whole life. I may be old, but I’m not dead yet, and I would really like to live the rest of my life “out loud”, but I just don’t know how. I happened upon Lori and Tiny Buddha by accident and have found her/it to be incredibly inspirational. I know that to all of you younger readers my story just sounds pathetic (some old broad feeling sorry for herself) but believe me, it can happen to anyone, no matter how talented you are. I looked at the website for Fear to Fuel and I feel like it’s really something that could help me at this stage of my life.

  • Guest

    I was very moved by what you shared here. I don’t know you, but if I were in your life when you were studying to be a concert pianist I would have begged you to not give up. Do something now! Don’t be afraid. When you are true to yourself and honor your talents you are giving others the courage to do the same. I’d say 90% of us out there have menial, dead-end jobs, who cares. Go find your passions and bask in joy they will bring to your life 🙂

  • Nancy

    Lori!! I’m excited about the possibility of winning this 🙂 I think I echo some of the things that others comment, but you’re blogs seem to fit perfectly with whatever situation I’m dealing with at the moment so … thank you 🙂

  • Joshmontez

    i like how you elaborate on the “elusive someday”. timothy ferris touches on that in his book “four hour work week” how “someday” is a disease that will take your dreams to the grave with you. so true and it definitely scared me in a good way when i read it. thank you for this article.

  • GBEE

    pick me pick me – sounds great and very timely!

  • Anonymous

    This eCourse sounds just what everybody needs! Nowadays when we’re held back by our own fears and our own confidence we could use a boosting kick in the butt. This could be the kick!

  • Blaze

    I’m interested in this course – I have been at the same job for more than 15 years. While it’s meaningful work, I don’t feel as if my skills and talents are being utilized to their fullest for the greater good. I am sitting in fear of financial insecurity and am afraid to disconnect emotionally. I could really use this as I contemplate my next chapter. Thank you Lori for your words of wisdom each day – sometimes I think you are hiding in my back pocket as your posts pretty much track my life events. Deep bow of gratitude to you my friend.

  • lindylou

    I believe I afraid of becoming too comfortable with the unknown. If I make a change it might be the best for me but I am not certain…what if it becomes comfortable then I will leave this part of me behind.

  • DalaLuz

    Fear has alas, been my very scary teacher for the past 12 years, but slowly I am taking small steps in recognizing its kindness. Perhaps fear is what I call ‘Boddhisattva Bootcamp’. If I won’t learn hoe to relate with fear now, in this lifetime, how can I expect to be free of it in de bardo’s, how can I truly relate to others if I am pushing so many things away? So I try, fail, try again, open up, even if all I can do is shiver & cry, I can still try to be with that. Slowly, slowly. My ‘intellect’ knows that my fear is worse than what it fears, that I stopped living my life because I am to afraid to live, but to bear with it is so much more difficult. To continue to love even this fearful, cowardice part, to embrace and give it space. I would not be able to even dream of it, if it were not for the precious Dharma, my precious teacher, the precious love & compassion of the Buddha’s that show me, again and again, that they never give up on me. This fearful warrior will try never to give up as well.

  • Mi

    This competition could not have entered at a better time in my life. I am at crossroads in life atm, by fears are hindering me from pursuing the life i would like to lead. I believe that i settle too easily for complacency and have an intense fear of going outside my comfort zone. I have almost every phobia in the phobia list. I want to break away from my social phobia especially and not fear social rejection anymore.. This intense fear of mine has crippled me for 20 years now and as time goes on, i feel more and more isolated and disconnected from society.. i want to possess the ability to relate to people, to give love and receive love in return. No man is an island, i don’t want to be lonely anymore..

  • Hi Kizel,

    I can totally relate to what you wrote. I performed in my teens and 20s and studied acting in school. I wanted to perform on Broadway but when I got to NYC, I was so scared of failing that I didn’t even try–not one single audition.

    I don’t think your story sounds pathetic at all, and I also don’t think you’re old. It’s never over until it’s over. I think a lot of people assume it’s too late to start being who they want to be, but it’s truly never too late until we decide it is. I’m glad that you’re thinking about the benefits of taking a course like this. It shows you have the drive to make changes in your life.

    I am going to be choosing the winners at random using randomizer, but if you don’t win this course and I can help you in any way, please don’t hesitate to let me know.

    Thanks for commenting here. I am happy to know you =)

    Lori

  • Kisane

    My word of the day to day is NOW! Now as in the present moment, it’s funny (actually saying that it is funny is kind of like being surprised by gravity but let’s go with the saying anyway) that you should write about this right now… I was on the verge of making a major decision with my pathway in terms of career (amongst other things – it’s seems I am presently going through that process of breaking myself down to build myself to where I want to be in life that you mentioned in your post), and the choice was to start the business that is my long term goal and had planned to open in October 2012 OR to work for someone else for a while to save some money so I can then open the business… The FEAR of making the right choice, succeeding, failing and so many other things have been clouding my thoughts, I have been looking for signs, answers, someone to tell me which path is right, without even noticing I was doing it… BUT this morning as I meditated (the second thing on the list of my morning ritual) I thought of the word NOW, the power of the present moment and decided in one fell swoop that why wait to do what I am passionate about, why must I work to save money so I can make money doing what I love? Why not use the strengths that I do have to START NOW! How exciting to make a decision, but how SCARY to dive right in… So then I moved to the third thing on my morning ritual, reading your blog… This post… Now I know I JUST decided to stop looking for signs, so I’ll call this a sense of synchronosity, but THANK YOU for sharing your thoughts on this because now my decision is set in stone… Ready, Set, Jump! (P.s. I adore reading your blog and every day get something from it – your work is meaningful and makes a huge impact on me and I am sure many others)…

  • Donn

    Sounds like a very interesting course!

  • Kizel

    Thank you, Lori. Regardless of what happens with this contest, I will continue to read your blog. As many other respondents have pointed out, you always seem to know what your readers need to hear when they need to hear it. I can’t tell you the number of times I have opened up my email and found a post from you or one of your guest writers that provides the inspiration, advice, or explanation needed for something I am currently dealing with. For someone so young, you are very wise, and I greatly respect what you are doing. Kizel

  • Kizel

    Thank you for your response and for your encouragement. They are both greatly appreciated. Kizel

  • Claudia

    Just what I need 🙂

  • Tanya

    This course sounds like exactly what I need to stop sabotaging my own success so I won’t ever be rejected. I’ve always been so afraid that I wouldn’t be enough – good enough, talented enough, pretty enough, persistent enough … I would very much like to turn that paralyzing fear into something useful and productive.

  • Candle64

    Fear taKes you to the “unknown”, but never fear, because tomorrow is unknown to you too. Push ahead and don’t look back, except to reflect and learn.

  • I am getting better at working happy and I’m looking around for a business/career coach so I’m looking forward to digging into Karl’s site. I get blocked with Planning. It seems to really bring up my anxiety and avoidance response.

  • Laurie

    As a young person, I too was involved in the arts. My mantra was “What stirs my soul does not pay my bills.” Now I need to break a belief. I too have struggled with meaningful work. For years I tried to do a day job to pay the bills and the arts at night. That left no time for anything else. Went through many years of “my work does not define me” but more out of defense than anything. Now I just want to work for a life and not for a living.

  • Oranges

    I just started a new job and I’d love to be able to branch out more. I’m doing what I’ve always done, and though it’s in a new environment I still feel somewhat like I’m sitting in my comfort zone and not doing anything new.
    I would enjoy this course.

  • Daniellev89

    If what one is pursuing is so worthless to them that they will employ themselves in other matters for money, maybe they should have better pursuits.

    Derived from Thoreau

  • Watching_fun

    This sounds great! Congrats on the affiliate.

  • Lkat

    Fear is the mind killer. I’d like to learn the full techniques for stomping out fear so I can realize full potential. I also want to share the techniques with others, and this is my biggest challenge. I can see people sometimes living a cycle of actions that they don’t seem to understand…my friends, loved ones, people at the rehabilitation center I work at, and I’d love to be a better help.

  • L33smithy

    Can not wait to read this book, looks really interesting!

  • Katy

    I re-tweeted. I’m really interested in this subject matter, in particular applying this approach to higher education and undergraduate career development. Thanks for the tip on this author!

  • Retweeted (@mizbankrupt). I would love the opportunity to figure out why it seems I always get in the way of my own success, and why others see me as successful and talented but I don’t see it. It couldn’t hurt to try and win!

  • Retweeted (@mizbankrupt). I would love the opportunity to figure out why it seems I always get in the way of my own success, and why others see me as successful and talented but I don’t see it. It couldn’t hurt to try and win!

  • Kaffer

    A little too late to enter the competition, but not too late to say Thank You. Tiny Buddha has been like tiny secret in my life and something to look forward to. Keep it clean! Inspirational and in alignment with a Higher Power! Perhaps it is Love. Blessings and Strength.

  • Kaffer

    A little too late to enter the competition, but not too late to say Thank You. Tiny Buddha has been like tiny secret in my life and something to look forward to. Keep it clean! Inspirational and in alignment with a Higher Power! Perhaps it is Love. Blessings and Strength.

  • Pingback: 8 Ways to Bounce Back from Disappointment & Create Real Success | Tiny Buddha()

  • Angela

    The world would be a much happier place if more people realized it is possible to do what we love and make a living off of it. We may not all end up millionaires financially, but more people would be trillionaires spiritually. Thanks for posting this – I’m off to boost my spiritual stocks by starting to do more that I love and less of what I put up with! What would we do without TinyBuddha? 😀

  • What a wonderful way of phrasing it. Thanks for commenting. I’m inspired by your spiritual stock boosting! =)

  • I could use this course, too! At 37 I’m still trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up!!