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pete

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Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 499 total)
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  • #379718
    pete
    Participant

    That’s ok, don’t see a reason why I should even visit this thread anymore. We hung out yesterday a few hrs hiking, but yeah we are pretty much done. Back with her guy that pretty much ended us (I really miss the old her, NOT this her), is happy for me to call her less as phone time seems to be mostly for her family and besties, since we hung out a few times already we are done until next year so I wont be talking to her until next summer. Like I said, that guy ended us. Time to move on and use the hate I have for that guy to better myself.

     

    Anyway good luck and stay safe but I wont be back to this place, it will remind me of her.

    #379253
    pete
    Participant

    Hey, long time! Just wanted to say we went no contact for 5 months(my request, wanted to work on myself and said no distractions to her but really just wanted to move on without saying that to her), only came back because I heard she was single, apparently just after we went no contact they broke up (lost his job, they were around each other all the time) but they are best friends and hang out all the time. We hung out last week and hanging out again next week, she wants to see friends more often now she says. Talked on phone 5 times in nearly a month including a few days ago where she was sooooo happy and emotional that we are talking due the things that happened to her that 1 amazing summer we had together and the anniversary of it. Her mother and step mom called and they had a 3 way call going, 1 of her daughters called and she said “and you called today ended up so perfect”, she literally called me a few seconds after I sent a text if I could call her like she had the phone in her hand waiting, ended call before it could have so she could call her other daughter before she passed out, took a while for her to hang up. Guess she really really really wanted to keep talking but it got quiet and awkward and I just wanted to hang up at that point. Trying to call her more often to make sure she’s doing ok before I stop again.

     

    As for me? really depressed, life sucks. Added some pounds on, eating like crap and feeling like crap. Did ask a girl for her number (she asked about me and loved talking to me and laughed a lot) but she wasted my time and text back saying it’s not a good idea so I don’t talk to her anymore when I see her unless it’s “hey”. I don’t act like I am miserable, no point I save it for when I am alone.

    #367293
    pete
    Participant

    I know you wont respond anymore but I just want to say I feel much better now that we no longer use this thread for talking about her, I think trapping myself in here made me lose it myself. We still talk and back in July when my cat was put down i delayed the time we were going to hike that mountain we been trying to do for years but never got around to do it, messaged her in late August and finally  5 days ago we went to the huge mountain for the first time and it took us an hour to go up to the very top, parts near the top we had to hold on tight or we woulda fell to our death and we yelled at the top (my idea). The next day we talked on phone for 10 minutes about how we were feeling, I wanted a really quick talk about how she was doing. She loved the hike a lot and we hugged and took off her shirt with just her bra on lol.

     

    I had an idea I wanted to run by her, she can’t commit to seeing me monthly and that’s fine she lives far away, plus gas costs a lot and commits to her neighbour who’s now one of her best friends all the time (going for dinner, dancing, etc but she loves the company of women over men). She seems to want things to happen to her instead of her make things happen for herself which was my mistake of asking her to do this a month or 2 months from now instead of “hey, let’s do something” so I asked her an idea of mine, that I understand she lives far away and we can’t hang out very much anymore so maybe sometimes after her work shift down the street from me we can walk around the block or something, she said she would really like that. So I fixed my problem, even if it means less time seeing her but more shorter days in a year seeing her. A month ago we talked for 45 minutes, longest talk in a while.

     

    Told her on the phone that I am going to start working on myself and in a few months we could do something, she got an annoyed voice and said for me to call her anytime I want, she really hates when I seem to mention “months”, whatever I got my own things to do and have been doing. Her guy doesn’t care we hang out, he hangs out with other women too, they are just “ok” she tells me. She pretty much always mentions her BFF next door every time we talk, never the guy.

     

    Hope you’re doing well. 🙂 Maybe 1 day in the future i’ll update on things about her or my life or whatever. I just don’t wanna deal with keeping this thread active all the time like I used to, I do NOT miss those days of me dealing with those emotions. Too many things I wanna do instead.

    #361494
    pete
    Participant

    Yeah since we stopped that thread I stopped talking to her and stopped with that dumb stuff, can’t be bothered with someone that gets a boyfriend and decides you have to do all the work now or you’re not in their life LMAO!!!! No longer sad about our old history or angry, I just forgot about her period and if she tries to reach out in a year or 2 and see how I am doing and to get together I will just tell her another time, that’s all I will say to her from now on as I don’t even want to hang ouut with her anymore. I’m no longer that person you knew back then, I started following red pill mindset and it puts things into perspective and not wasting my time around people like that anymore, I aint gonna allow some woman to steal MY energy anymore nor any woman because I hold my own power and I’m gonna try and not be like I used to, more women can be around if I choose to let them be around, but I wont cling to a woman. Also I kept going for so long I think because I kept going back to that thread, it’s retired now for good. You can call me pete if you wish.

     

    As for my cat, he will be dearly missed. What gives me a glimmer of hope of seeing all of them again is this video.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hz_4FGdWVF8 and videos of huff paranormal. In a few months I will get another kitty, in the meantime I will just greave and get on my purpose with no distractions any more. Judging by how stupid people are in the world by hearing about the pandemic idiots, I may not be as dumb as I think I was. I need to get in shape and start making $$$, maybe I can easily afford a few kitties and a few doggies plus the other things I want.

    #361495
    pete
    Participant

    Apparently my post is awaiting moderation that I made. :/

     

    Anyway I am not the same person, started following red pill mindset and while I am not gonna end things with her I am no longer keeping in touch with her, done wasting my time and not talked to her since. You can call me pete if you wish.

     

    I miss my boy, and what gives me hope to being able to see all my cats and my dog is watching steve huff on youtube and a video called “Sam Parnia – Is Life After Death Possible?”.

    Now it’s time to get on my purpose…no more distractions. Get money, get a few kitties and doggies and work on self developement.

    #357561
    pete
    Participant

    Alright, thanks for all the help and support in this thread over the years and stay safe over there. 🙂

    #357556
    pete
    Participant

    I’m gonna block her from my phone so she wont hear from me period until I am ready to just be friends. I’d still wanna hang out and talk on the phone obviously but I need a break from this all.

    #357552
    pete
    Participant

    No contact. I wont say no contact but I wont message her until 2021 as a mean of trying to move on, so 6 months.

     

    Maybe I can do the things she and I have talked about that we both have been wanting to do or doing.

    #357543
    pete
    Participant

    Alright I will say that to her, was thinking of giving it until Jan at least to try and move on a little before coming back and trying to just be her friend.

    #357538
    pete
    Participant

    Thanks for the tips, i’ll try remembering them in the moment. I guess I should change the words I w ill tell her at the hike from

     

    “I’ll let you think about if you still want to remain friends and give you until August 1st, if I don’t hear back from you by then you wont hear from me again”

     

    to more…

     

    “I am gonna take some time away for a while, but if you still wanna talk and see me message me before Aug 1”. I am not going to let her respond to what I will tell her, I am not looking for an answer just a release after all these years, an answer wont mean anything to me because the past is the past and long gone and I am just living in the long gone. After that I think it’s best I let her know to not reach out to me until I reach out when I am ready.

    #357501
    pete
    Participant

    We talked for 34 minutes, it’s going to get dark soon so I told her I am gonna let you go so you can do a little gardening work you wanted to do today but didn’t before it gets dark and you can’t.

     

    I told her how sorry I was, she said no don’t worry about it, it’s just me being me  i’m not very good at texting or calling and she was sorry, told her no I want to appologize I dunno what I was thinking and that was a little harsh of me and said I accept your appology and we all have our insecurities including me but I accept your appology and said she likes having me as her friend. Talked about a few people at my work she dearly misses and and loves, and used to always be in touch with but havn’t since the move, told her last summer the one she loves told me she was sad when she moved away with her boyfriend, so  told her she should message them and do something with them, she said she will even if it’s a walk from a distance. She really wants to be more social, she misses it and not hanging out with anyone and really wants to start doing cardio everyday. I was inspiring her with things, sent me a video. Talked about her man and things are not all sunshine and rainbows, the wow factor has died down and it’s more them settling down with family stuff now, she wants to settle down more.

     

    Also told me about her best friend that lives far away they recently talked, they normally talk every couple months on the  phone. It’s mostly me and her mom that talk, sometimes her daughters for a few minutes. Also other things but that’s the jist of it, told her bye and that we need to talk about the hike next month soon and she said “yeah sure”. I also told her that I try talking atleast 1 maybe 2 times a month and nothing more, I have a problem where I think I am being annoying if I call too much so I prefer it this way and that if we did talk more what would we even talk about? she said no call whenever, that she likes talking to me and she wont get annoyed if we talked more. But I am not going to, I still feel trapped talking on the phone like I am stuck in a box or something even if she does have a really nice voice.

     

    Now it’s time to watch a few videos she text me.

    #357481
    pete
    Participant

    BTW I did tell her a few months back on the phone “maybe 1 day I will tell you why I am the way I am” and she said “Oh”. Anyway I am going to play some games now. She does seem to like when I open up to her about feelings and stuff, like that call late Dec about her darkness and when she told me she’s not scared to die from covid, told me I have such good words. Or when I first told her I want her to be free she said “You want me to be free?” in an OMG!!!!!! type of tone. I guess nobody tells her this stuff. :/

     

     

    I legit teared up the whole time writing that long post, took me a while to write it thinking back and all.

    #357479
    pete
    Participant

    Thanks and it’s best to do these things in person rather a text/email/phone call.

    #357476
    pete
    Participant

    What if the guy is with her on that long hike? should I still tell her with him listening?

    #357475
    pete
    Participant

    Home from work now. Here, what I will do is tell her the truth when we hang out in July, it will just be me and her hanging out for 2-3 hours and at the end when we are about to leave I will tell her that I did not want anyone to forget her so I brought people to her restaurant job but truth was I did not wanna forget her. About that day in the summer when we connected it left a powerful effect on me and I still think of that day and that summer we got really really close like I have never felt a closeness to someone before and we slowed down after a few months then picked it up again in that October and how awesome I felt talking to someone on the phone and it felt like you really really liked talking to me and were sad that night we didn’t after your dance class you taught when I was tired and that trip for your advancement when we had that moment together at the end of the phone call when I told you to call me anytime for good/bad news, just because, etc and I still mean it to this day and I was going to tell you my feelings a long time ago before your guy but someone at work told me you got a lot going on in your life and only connection to the old job and you really need a friend so I sucked it up and was going to eventually tell you but never did and it’s going to be a huge regret in my life even if you didn’t feel the same way, I would have atleast told you that I loved you since pretty much the beginning. When we hung out for our first hike and saw you put makeup on after texting you I was near I thought “maybe she does like me???”, and the phone call when you told me we are always going to be together getting through everything together and when you wanted to see me when I  went to a life coach and to call you after to know how it went.

     

    You’re special to me and always will be and I am not trying to say this to you to try and steal you from your guy, I would never do that to anyone nor do I want you or him to hate me, nor me hate either of you, he makes you happy and that’s all that really matters in the end, I really miss the old days when we would text in the morning for a few minutes, it got me through some really tough times and even in those minutes it brought big joy to my day and now you know why I wanna see you more then 1-2 times a year, I am sure if we saw eachother monthly I will still want more and I hope your guy is kind to you and treats you with loving respect and does not stray you from your path, be at peace together, always. Love eachother, grow together, be happy, be kind, be free and never let  people change you unless it’s the good kind. Thank you for letting me help you in your darkness and teaching me along the way.

     

    I’ll let you go now, I dunno how things will change between us now but at least I got my truth out, and now you know what’s been eating me alive. I’ll let you think about if you still want to remain friends and give you until August 1st, if I don’t hear back from you by then you wont hear from me again but I will wish you well on your life journey and would understand why you don’t wanna keep communicating.

Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 499 total)