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anita

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Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 27,505 total)
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  • #346468

    anita
    Participant

    Dear Pedro:

    1. “She was always clear about how she felt about me, but at the beginning she was much more loved. Then it stopped being and it was only once in a while”-

    -do you mean that she always told you that she is angry with you when she was angry at you?

    -do you mean that at the beginning you showed her more love, then you stopped showing her that you love her?

    2. “about a month ago it started to be a lot more than I was used to”- what is “it” (in bold)?

    3. “Dating her was always a roller coaster ride, as if she was going to be in a good mood, if she was going to be cheeky, or if she was going to be upset with me” – did she change her mood/attitude a lot (not being stable, or dependable) and you didn’t know what to expect?

    *Please answer these clearly, otherwise I will not be able to understand you and I will have to give up trying.

    anita

    #346460

    anita
    Participant

    Dear Pedro:

    At first she was very clear with you about what she feels and wants, and then she stopped being clear with you. Because she wasn’t clear with you, you started to over-think, wondering what is it that she feels and wants. Not knowing what she feels and wants confused you and caused you distress.

    You now think that maybe her not being clear with you for so long is the reason you started thinking that you don’t love her, the reason behind your “Love Suddenly Gone”-

    – did I understand correctly?

    (I will be back to the computer in about three hours).

    anita

    #346454

    anita
    Participant

    Dear Pedro:

    What I did understand from your recent post is that your girlfriend doesn’t live with you, but with her parents (good thing!), and that you were with her Sunday, it felt “like it was the first date”, but then your thoughts that you don’t love her returned.

    I didn’t understand your first paragraph because you didn’t write it clearly. If you want to take your time and re-write it, please do and I will reply to you further.

    anita

    #346448

    anita
    Participant

    Do ask, Hanro!

    anita

    #346446

    anita
    Participant

    Dear Joe:

    This woman has become associated in your brain with the following unpleasant and painful emotional experiences: “very ugly.. hurt.. damaged… sting.. nag at me.. pierces like a dagger.. extremity of this pain”.

    You want to “find a way to dampen it”, it being the above, which is associated in your brain with thoughts, memories and images of this woman.

    “Any ideas?”, you asked. My answer: it will be difficult to do and it will take work and time because .. it takes work and time to change brain connections already made- it is literally a physical- neurological change.

    The work I suggest is to reconnect your thoughts/memories/ images of her to a different emotional experience by creating a guided meditation for yourself, on audio,  where in a relaxed state, taking slow breaths, maybe to the sound of relaxing music,  you imagine her and repeat certain sentences out loud. Through repetition, over time, you will habituate your brain to experience a lesser intensity of the negative emotions currently associate with her, and experience more and more peace of mind in regard to memories and thoughts of her.

    Is this making sense to you?

    anita

     

    #346440

    anita
    Participant

    Dear CB:

    To “accept for whatever reason it’s over and try to move forward”, you will need to somehow stop turning the same thoughts over and over in your mind and making yourself ill. Time to practice mindfulness exercises (available online, maybe on the home page of this website under Blogs), maybe get into a yoga routine that will be gentle on your back, some aerobic exercise, so to get your mind off the same-old-same-old thoughts.

    “I want to show my son that I’m a proud woman that’s happy in my own skin”- you can’t show him that you are happy in your own skin when you are not happy in your own skin, but you can show him that you are taking the right actions toward becoming comfortable in your own skin. If he sees you practicing mindfulness exercises, doing yoga,  some aerobic exercise, following a daily routine that works for you, then he will see that you are a strong woman.

    To be a strong woman does not mean to feel happy (although that would be nice); it means to take the right actions on a daily basis, day after day, toward feeling better in the future.

    anita

    #346436

    anita
    Participant

    * This is the post above, reposted without the mess:

    Dear Reader:

    My earlier post to you was based on Wikipedia information on a variety of topics. The current is based on the same as well as sources that I will mention.

    Let’s look at Covid-19 vs. the seasonal influenza aka the flu:  both are infectious, viral (both caused by RNA viruses), airborne, as well as being transferred directly by touching an infected surface and then touching one’s face, or shaking someone else’s hand. Both can be mild or severe, there are common symptoms to the two, like fever, coughing and fatigue, both can result in pneumonia, and both can be spread by people before showing symptoms.

    In Wikipedia’s entry on Influenza it reads: “Frequent hand washing reduces the risk of viral spread, as does wearing a surgical mask.. Reasonably effective ways to reduce transmission on influenza include good personal health and hygiene habits such as: not touching the eyes, nose or mouth, frequent hand washing, covering coughs and sneezes; avoiding close contact with sick people; and staying home when sick.. face masks might help prevent transmission when caring for the sick.. surface sanitizing may help prevent some infections. Alcohol is an effective sanitizer against influenza viruses.. Social distancing strategies.. such as closing schools, churches and theaters, slowed the spread of the virus”- all this is true for influenza and Covid-19.

    But the two are not the same. According to www. hopkinsmedicine. org/ health/ conditions and diseases/ coronavirus/ coronavirus- disease- 2019- vs- the- flu (no spaces), there is a list of differences between the two:

    (* what’s in parentheses in what follows are my comments)

    1. Covid-19 is caused by one virus, SARS-CoV-2 while the flu is caused by any of several different types and strains of influenza viruses.

    2. It is possible that Covid-19 is spread more easily than the flu, that the droplets from a Covid-19 infected person’s breath/ cough/sneeze remains in the air longer than do the droplets from a flu infected person. (Each Covi-19 sufferer infects between 2 to 3 others,Ro=2.2, which is a reproduction rate up to twice as high as seasonal flu, which typically infects 1.3 new people for each patient, Ro=1.28).

    3. In the case of the flu there are antiviral medications that can address symptoms and sometimes shorten the duration of the illness. No such medications for Covid-19 exist at this time.

    4. There are vaccines for the flu (and have been for a long, long time, although previous vaccines become ineffective because the influenza viruses mutate a lot, so the vaccines have to be updated regularly). Existing vaccines are effective in preventing some of the most dangerous flu types/ reducing the severity of the flu.  There is no vaccine for Covid-19 at this time (or for any of the known coronaviruses).

    5. There is an estimated 1 billion cases of the flu worldwide, and (close to a million) cases of Covid-19 (in roughly 4 months of the outbreak turned pandemic)

    6. There are 291,000- 646,000 worldwide flu deaths, and close to 40,000 worldwide Covid-19 deaths (in roughly 4 months of this outbreak turned pandemic), “the mortality rate of Covid-19 .. is thought to be higher than that of most strains of the flu”. (The CFR, Case Mortality Rate, of the seasonal flu is 0.1%, the CFR of Covid-19 was estimated by WHO on March 3 to be 3.4%).

    7. Lots of people carry antibodies for the flu because of being previously infected by the it (although antibodies for a previous flu may not work for a new case of the flu because of the high rate of mutation of the influenza viruses), and therefore have immunity for it, but because Covid-19 is new, people do not have antibodies for it/ have no immunity to it.

    8. According to healthline. com/ heath/ coronavirus- vs- flu # differences (no spaces), Covid-19 symptoms are mild in the beginning and develop gradually while the flu symptoms develop rapidly, Covid-19 takes 2-14 days to incubate, while the flu takes 1-4 days, the most common symptoms observed in Covid-19 are: fever, cough, fatigue and shortness of breath. Shortness of breath is not in the list of common symptoms of the flu.

    “Data to date suggests that about 20 percent of people with Covid-19 experience severe or critical illness, requiring hospitalization and often the administration of oxygen or mechanical ventilation. Although there are millions of flu cases each year in the United States, a smaller percentage of flu cases are estimated to result in hospitalization”

    — More tomorrow.

    #346434

    anita
    Participant

    Dear Janus, Earth Angel and Poet:

    Good to read back from you, and to know you are doing well. I am having as good a week as I can, thank you. So even Earth Angels do spring cleaning around the house ! I wan to read your post regarding your scientific understanding of the coronavirus when I feel more rested, which will be tomorrow morning, if not earlier. I will be back to your thread later.

    anita

    #346432

    anita
    Participant

    Dear Zeeza:

    You are welcome. I am glad to read back from you!

    It’s a good visual, seeing you cleaning your apartment in a summer dress. I am glad you unfriended your mother. I want to thoroughly read your whole post and will do so later when I am more rested. I will be back to your thread later today.

    anita

    #346430

    anita
    Participant

    Dear Nichole:

    I am so sorry to read this… Is it the same fear and shame from before, that you are feeling now?

    anita

    #346426

    anita
    Participant

    Dear Reader:

    My earlier post to you was based on Wikipedia information on a variety of topics. The current is based on the same as well as sources that I will mention.

    Let’s look at Covid-19 vs. the seasonal influenza aka the flu:  both are infectious, viral (both caused by RNA viruses), airborne, as well as being transferred directly by touching an infected surface and then touching one’s face, or shaking someone else’s hand. Both can be mild or severe, there are common symptoms to the two, like fever, coughing and fatigue, both can result in pneumonia, and both can be spread by people before showing symptoms.

    In Wikipedia’s entry on Influenza it reads: “Frequent hand washing reduces the risk of viral spread, as does wearing a surgical mask.. Reasonably effective ways to reduce transmission on influenza include good personal health and hygiene habits such as: not touching the eyes, nose or mouth, frequent hand washing, covering coughs and sneezes; avoiding close contact with sick people; and staying home when sick.. face masks might help prevent transmission when caring for the sick.. surface sanitizing may help prevent some infections. Alcohol is an effective sanitizer against influenza viruses.. Social distancing strategies.. such as closing schools, churches and theaters, slowed the spread of the virus”- all this is true for influenza and Covid-19.

    But the two are not the same. According to www. hopkinsmedicine. org/ health/ conditions and diseases/ coronavirus/ coronavirus- disease- 2019- vs- the- flu (no spaces), there is a list of differences between the two:

    (* what’s in parentheses in what follows are my comments)

    1. Covid-19 is caused by one virus, SARS-CoV-2 while the flu is caused by any of several different types and strains of influenza viruses.

    2. It is possible that Covid-19 is spread more easily than the flu, that the droplets from a Covid-19 infected person’s breath/ cough/sneeze remains in the air longer than do the droplets from a flu infected person. (Each Covi-19 sufferer infects between 2 to 3 others,Ro=2.2, which is a reproduction rate up to twice as high as seasonal flu, which typically infects 1.3 new people for each patient, Ro=1.28).

    3. In the case of the flu there are antiviral medications that can address symptoms and sometimes shorten the duration of the illness. No such medications for Covid-19 exist at this time.

    4. There are vaccines for the flu (and have been for a long, long time, although previous vaccines become ineffective because the influenza viruses mutate a lot, so the vaccines have to be updated regularly). Existing vaccines are effective in preventing some of the most dangerous flu types/ reducing the severity of the flu.  There is no vaccine for Covid-19 at this time (or for any of the known coronaviruses).

    5. There is an estimated 1 billion cases of the flu worldwide, and (close to a million) cases of Covid-19 (in roughly 4 months of the outbreak turned pandemic)

    6. There are 291,000- 646,000 worldwide flu deaths, and close to 40,000 worldwide Covid-19 deaths (in roughly 4 months of this outbreak turned pandemic), “the mortality rate of Covid-19 .. is thought to be higher than that of most strains of the flu”. (The CFR, Case Mortality Rate, of the seasonal flu is 0.1%, the CFR of Covid-19 was estimated by WHO on March 3 to be 3.4%).

    7<span style=”display: inline !important; float: none; background-color: #ffffff; color: #333333; cursor: text; font-family: Georgia,’Times New Roman’,’Bitstream Charter’,Times,serif; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;”>. Lots of people carry antibodies for the flu because of being previously infected by the it (although antibodies for a previous flu may not work for a new case of the flu because of the high rate of mutation of the influenza viruses), and therefore have immunity for it, but because Covid-19 is new, people do not have antibodies for it/ have no immunity to it. </span>

    8. According to healthline. com/ heath/ coronavirus- vs- flu # differences (no spaces), Covid-19 symptoms are mild in the beginning and develop gradually while the flu symptoms develop rapidly, Covid-19 takes 2-14 days to incubate, while the flu takes 1-4 days, the most common symptoms observed in Covid-19 are: fever, cough, fatigue and shortness of breath. Shortness of breath is not in the list of common symptoms of the flu.

    “Data to date suggests that about 20 percent of people with Covid-19 experience severe or critical illness, requiring hospitalization and often the administration of oxygen or mechanical ventilation. Although there are millions of flu cases each year in the United States, a smaller percentage of flu cases are estimated to result in hospitalization”

    — More tomorrow.

    anita

     

     

     

    #346386

    anita
    Participant

    Still thinking about you, hoping you are okay!

    anita

    #346384

    anita
    Participant

    Dear Daniel:

    I wanted to let you know that I am thinking about you and hoping you are okay!

    anita

    #346382

    anita
    Participant

    Dear Janus, Earth Angel and Poet:

    I am thinking about you. Hoping you are okay!

    anita

    #346380

    anita
    Participant

    Dear Zeeza:

    I want to let you know that I am thinking about you and hoping that you are okay!

    anita

Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 27,505 total)