I’d never voiced that before, that my husband is irresponsible towards his children – but it is clear. I think my family is fever entry against divorce so have undermined all my thoughts and feelings about his behaviour – saying he’s nice and even that I’m making him behave like this. Could be true, could not be, either ways it’s dysfunctipn right?

I agree with what you say. I actually am very clear at the moment that for the next few weeks my focus is making sure I am calm and centred for my children. I can contact the welfare system to ideograms what support would be available to us in the UK. I have found a few small nurturing schools in the south of England that operate 3 days a week and are far more nurturing than most. I think they’d be a good fit.

Thank you for support thus far, I honestly feel like somethings flicked in my brain and I’m myself again.