Anita,

Yes, I can be emotional, but I normally keep it in. I am not outwardly emotional. So the roller coaster I was on with him…is in fact due in part to his bad treatment of me. It’s not “all in my head” as you make it sound. I do agree that therapy could help but in reference to him as much as anything else. I do need & want peace. I respectfully disagree with your opinion that my expectations are unreasonable. Who gets into a relationship to mistreat and NOT love someone? HE asked ME to be in a relationship with him and then he mistreated me. So I don’t understand how you can say that I was unreasonable. No I don’t expect him to do anything except what he SAID he would do. LOVE me and treat me right; which his did half heartedly also while he was disappearing & lying to me about MANY things. I have been in several other relationships that were fine and I had no issues such as these because the men actually loved me and treated me well. So I know for a fact I can be in a normal healthy relationship. We have never gotten into a bad “fight” where we yelled at each other; neither of us have raised our voices ever. We always “discuss” our issues calmly and rationally so that is not an issue either. The problem is that although I am willing to admit MY faults he will NEVER admit that he does anything wrong ever. He blames me. And in his previous relationships he blames is Ex’s it’s never him according to him. I am a reasonable person. All I ever expected from him was to be honest, trustworthy, and loving. He was NOT. So Again he was unreasonable thinking that I should be HAPPY and satisfied with being mistreated. I have an extreme amount of empathy for his illness that’s one reason I stayed so long even though he mistreated me because I took that into account and it’s one reason why I still worry about him. Because I do love him and want him to be ok. I am taking care of myself. I want nothing more than for BOTH of us to be happy. I am working on myself and I when and if the time is right I will talk to him and have a calm & rational conversation with him. SO we can both have closure & peace of mind.

Butterfly