Dear Samir:

The pain of betrayal. It is a heavy pain. And you are suffering this pain. Shame is on your father for hurting you as badly as he did. My empathy is with you, the victim of this ongoing crime.

Regarding forgiving him: if he didn’t ask for forgiveness AND did not offer to make amends, financial amends and then proceeded to make them all the way- what would be the basis for considering forgiving him?

It wouldn’t be wise to forgive him and put your trust in him again, would it? Denying the reality of what happened and what is happening is the road to disaster for you. Reality does not accommodate the denial of it.

It wouldn’t be possible for you to have peace-of-mind if you forgive him and continue to watch him benefiting from his crime against you. How can you forgive a person for stabbing you while he continues to stab you? How do you stop bleeding?

If I was you, I would do anything I can to legally get a hold of those $500,000. You can unearth bank records of your financial transfers through the years. I don’t know if there is a way for you to legally go for that money. Maybe consult an attorney. During such and afterwards, I would cut all contact with him.

When a man (your father) betrays his own son year after year, never to apologize, never to make amends- financial amends in this case- well, let him receive the natural and reasonable consequence that he earned: losing his son’s trust, esteem, affection and contact.

Get any part of your money if legally possible; then cut your losses and move far away.