Dear Kaynah:

I think that part of you believes that he loves you. Every time he says he does, that belief in you gets stronger: he loves me! It is that strong belief that is keeping you hooked, stuck, not moving on. You wrote in your note to me: “Well maybe im not in love with him- but an idea of him?”- I think you are in love with the idea of him loving you.

You wrote in your post earlier: “I never had closure because he was never honest.”- it is as if you are waiting for him to tell you: “I love you and I am ready to be a family with you and only you (and child)!” OR-

“I do not love you, never will.”

So until he tells you this OR that (and follows through with behavior)- you cannot have closure. He may never tell you this or that. There may be a point when you figure it our yourself, which one it is: the first or the second.

Then, you will be able to have closure, even while co parenting!

anita