Thank you so much everyone. Everything you are all saying makes so much sense. I suppose its just re-telling yourself all these things to get by, and remind myself we did break up for a reason.

Poppy- thanks for your comments. He hasn’t really made any effort at all to try to work on things. He said he thinks im trying to cause drama by asking why he didnt try to stop me from going. He thinks I just want the chase, and also said he wished I had of given him some slack due to the pressure he was under at work. I told him that’s no excuase to treat me the way he did, and he said he understood that. But for some reason he can never fully accept responsibility for something.

Anita- I love him, I really do, and I miss him and the good times, but as I write out the bad, I kind of miss that less and less and know i deserve better. Thanks for the reminder!

I did get a message from my dad yesterday about the break up (we are not very close). He said sorry to hear, but that he worries about me. I feel like a bit of a loser now because I’m single again at 34 and my dad isn’t really being uplifting or supportive…just that he feels sorry for me basically. 🙁