Dear Marge:

You are welcome. I have two comments today. One is about what you wrote earlier, that it feels “Like this will never be over”- it FEELS this way, but that doesn’t make it so.

Second comment is about what you wrote in your original post: “He has angry issues… he still yelled and curse at me and his families members, including his mother. I always found that unacceptable, specially because I come from a ‘respect-based’ education and my family cherish respect and empathy more than anything.”

It is unacceptable, of course, for him to yell and curse at you. The fact that he did that is worrisome. Next time he feels angry, will he do that again? And if not next time, maybe the next…

Clearly he is angry at his mother. If you were to connect with him, to reach a higher level of intimacy (which probably is not a good idea for you), you will need, I believe, to … respect the fact that he is angry at his mother, to feel empathy for him because he must have been significantly hurt by his mother. A child doesn’t unjustly feel anger at his mother (I assume that is when he started feeling angry at her). It may very well be that empathy is something she lacked for him. Something he desperately needs.

anita