Hi Marge,

I’m sorry, I’m a bit late in replying to your post, and it looks like you have some great replies from very caring, amazing people. One thing that concerned me, was that you had hoped “that he could change” after reading your posts, the saying came into my mind, is that you can’t change someone who’s got so much stuff and troubled inside going on, and there was no mention of him wanting to do any work to want to change. (such as therapy).

Another thing that came to mind is “you can’t teach an old dog new tricks” meaning, he is very set in his ways and that is how he wants tto stay, you can try to change him, rationalize with him until you are exhausted, but I am sure this is not what you want for your life. It is best to find a healthy man who deserves you.