Dear Sophie:

I think traveling for you is a great idea, since you love traveling, it is your passion and it has made you feel strong and confident in the past. Less conflict in traveling than in relationships!

You are not a married woman. You didn’t mention having been proposed to by your boyfriend, or having marriage being a consideration, did you? This means, you are still single. Go travel.

Reads to me like you don’t know your boyfriend very well, don’t know his motivations, what to expect from him, whether he is trustworthy or not. And so, not traveling because of the relationship with him doesn’t make sense to me.

It is possible that he does love you. It is possible that he knows of your conflicting motivations: to be with him and to not be with him and maybe it soothes him (because of his conflicted motivation, perhaps..) to know that he will be free soon, I don’t know. But do you know…?

It will be good if you can talk with him about anything and everything, find out his motivations, what makes him do what he does, get to know him (being in a relationship with him and when you communicate with  him otherwise, as when traveling, email or phone). This way, instead of overthinking-on-empty, you gather real information for better (and less) thinking.

anita