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Reply To: My friend is upset with me and I don\’t know how to deal with it

HomeForumsRelationshipsMy friend is upset with me and I don\’t know how to deal with itReply To: My friend is upset with me and I don\’t know how to deal with it

#155818
oliaS
Participant

Thank you to everyone who responded to my post.  You all offered great insight and advise.  I have spoken to him since.  I said I wanted to clear something up and mentioned that I’ve noticed a change in his behaviour towards me.  I apologized for anything that I’d said or done to upset him.  I brought up the issue about the job very briefly and, as anita suggested, explained what I had learned from that incident and I also commented that I didn’t want it to be the rift that disrupts our friendship.  He responded with, ‘we’re good, I’ve had a lot on my mind – it’s been racing in all different directions’.  I was surprised I got that much out of him because he’s not much of a talker.  I extended my arm and we shook hands.

Yesterday he was in the office again.  We exchanged pleasantries and talked a bit about how we were coping with things.  I started to ask a question, but then stopped, thinking it might be too personal.  He encouraged me to ask it, so I did.  It was an open-ended question and he actually answered it and included personal details.  I kept it short and sweet.

So, I think we’re on a good path and going in the right direction.  I believe he needs space right now.  He knows I’m there if he needs me.  I’ll wait to see what happens.  If he chooses to distance himself, then, as PearceHawk, Manders and Hana said, I’ll just have to move on.  My biggest issue with that is dealing with my insecurities around feeling like it’s a personal rejection, but I’m working on that.

Thanks, again, to everyone who shared their thoughts with me.  They were very helpful.

oliaS