Eliana,

Thank you for responding.

Yes, I feel he is still putting everything on me, that any issue is my fault and “i” need to fix things by changing my ways or to say I’m sorry, I was wrong. I have not felt excited about our last 2 talks. If we got back together, I know he would point out my faults in this situation…a way to control me, a way to think he is right and I’m wrong or did wrong. After it would get better than over time it would deteriorate by taking advantage of situations. We broke up a couple of times in the past and I always made contact and explained that I wanted him. This time, I have not missed him and am ok to move on even if I’m alone. I also think my relationship with his kids would not be good, rather on the “cool” side, it would be uncomfortable for me. No he hasn’t said he missed me, but I didn’t say it either. The two times we broke up he was quick to go out on a date or start dating…I went out a few times but I couldn’t hold the guys hand or kiss him cause it didn’t feel right..but I know he slept with another woman. He says each time  he realized they weren’t me..and wanted to be with me. He’s a stubborn person, but I can be too. I’m not perfect by any means, however, I think this time I’m done. I thought how will I feel if I see him with another woman..I may feel otherwise, but I think I could handle it..yah it may hurt but I hope it would be a day I look dam good lol. During this time apart ive had rimes where I questioned if I’m too hard and should be more of a softer person…I am a harder type personality than a lot of other women..and I’ve been told that by my family members..but than I have a very soft sensitive personality. Where I could cry just watching a lame commercial. Things make me tough..but other things bring out my soft side. The last 2 times we broke up I would mark on my calander another day no contact…this time ..haven’t even touched it. I bike a new cycle of 17 km not anywhere near where he lives a couple times a week..I walk daily..except today..I felt lazy lol. I don’t plan on being in contact with him again. So what are your thoughts? And if he contacts me ..which I think he will , maybe not soon but in a few weeks…should I just ignore him? …I’m the type if I get a text…I reply ..always cause I think it’s rude not to.

Hugs

Macy