Hi Jeff and Craig,

Thanks Craig for sharing Al Turtle’s Relationship Map.  I think all of us could learn a thing or two from his research and experience.  He has many thought provoking ideas of things/behaviors/ideas that help and hurt relationships.  I appreciate his insights.  Jeff, I think you would too.

Jeff, It is true.  Grieving is a long process.  It’s not a “wave a magic wand” and you’re over it.  You spent time building your relationship with your ex-girlfriend.  And it will take time to grieve for the loss of it as well.  You will spend much time contemplating the good things about it.  That’s ok.  It will also be necessary for you to think about the reasons why you broke-up.  The things that you didn’t want.  The things that you were longing for.

My biggest question for you is Why are you so afraid of being alone?  Or what is it about being alone that scares you?  Maybe this is an opportunity to get to know yourself better.  To learn to love and accept yourself where you are, while striving to become a better version of yourself.  I don’t know if you’ve ever done that in your life or not.  I just know that it is important to be comfortable in your own skin.  Before you jump into another relationship, contemplate just “Dating” yourself.  I know it sounds weird.  But look for the things that bring you some relief.  Bring you some joy.  Stop running away from yourself.  You might find that you actually enjoy your own company and that you’re a good man whom, someday, some woman is going to feel really lucky to have in her life.

Take Care.

Dawn