Hi Gia,

Sorry that you’re going through all of this. When I’m reading the description of that tenant uttering threats, advising you to not listen to the devil, listening into his apartment with microphones, him hearing noises of dragging, wall-banging etc – it is him who has a problem, it reads like a mental health disorder which may or may not have been diagnosed. Or he may not be taking his medications properly, hence the deterioration in his behavior (especially when he is living alone and there is no family, etc visiting).

I don’t think your initial behavior of seeking him out to find a compromise was naïve, because it has shown you what your other tenant actually is like. There is nothing wrong in playing music during normal daytime hours (eg from 9am to 7pm). Have you asked your landlord for some advice? I’ve always believed in knowing a brief background of your neighbours at least (but can be hard sometimes when you don’t meet the rest of the tenants due to work, etc).

Have you also asked the burly man next door if this particular tenant has tried to ‘threaten’ him in the same way he has done to you? Get a friend to accompany you. The burly man may not have realised the situation, and on your part you may also get a new neighbor keeping an eye on things. The tenant may have tried to intimidate you because (I do apologise for stereotyping here, but it has also happened to me before) you are female, and may be of a smaller built than him. What have the police done when you first alerted them to that tenant? Have you been able to tell the police the whole story up until now?

Gia, I hope my words won’t unnecessarily alarm you further (sorry), but I would consider moving out to a place that you can play your piano freely, and that you are not increasingly feeling fearful.

Take care.

Hana