Dear Victoria:

I hope you can get the help you need to heal from the abusive relationship you were in, quality psychotherapy seems to me, would be such help. Then you won’t be so scared anymore.

You wrote: “i know i hurt him everytime i dump him but i cant help it”- if you can’t help hurting your boyfriend, better end the relationship with him.

I hope you can help it, find a way to feel the distress and to not automatically react to it by dumping him. If you can’t, the right thing to do by him is to  let him not you are unable and to let him know that after some quality psychotherapy where you learn to tolerate distress without automatically reacting to it, then you can resume the relationship.

I hope you post again.

anita