Dear Mina:

You are in a lot of pain, emotional pain. Very much so. I wish it wasn’t so but it is and better accept what is. No benefit in denying it: your attachment to your ex boyfriend is strong, as strong as it ever was before. You feel intensely that you need him and you miss him so very much.

Should you reach out to him? I think so. I don’t see the harm in that. You are suffering as is. I wouldn’t share with him that you think about being free of pain in heaven (last paragraph thoughts). But I would definitely “be honest with my ex boyfriend and instead of going on with the whole stupid sacrifice thing, I should just admit it to him that I am very much struggling and I get very sad very often too”-

yes, be honest.

Will be back at the computer in 18 hours or so. Take good care of yourself, please.

anita