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Hi Francesca. Thank you for the reply.
I can’t afford therapy since I’m a college student. Mostly I keep to myself but meeting my boyfriend, I feel I tell him a lot more of how I feel at times and my thoughts. But sometimes it’s hard because I don’t know why I have a big reaction to something most people find small or insignificant. Most times he’s just quiet and I’m the one talking most times, in good or bad moments. We have talked about this many times before and thought about how to deal with it but when I get like this, sometimes it’s like we forget we had that conversation. It doesn’t help that he’s the type that keeps to himself too and I tell him to let me know what he’s thinking or feeling. Sometimes he doesn’t tell unless we fight or when I ask him about it. I try putting effort to understanding each other by occasionally having discussions and asking random personal questions I find online.
I do tend to have expectations and assume he should know since I’ve told him that I have anxiety and I’m insecure. It’s something hard to change without therapy but I wish there was something effective that I could try without therapy or anything costly. I don’t know who to reach out to and who’s reliable.
We had this talk a while ago and he said he liked that I was positive and kind. We were fine in the beginning but after almost a year we started fighting a lot. He told me sometimes when I’m like this it’s hard to be around me. But that is also when I need him the most for emotional support.