Dear Steven B:

She works at a wine bar and as a couple psychotherapist? And is the mother of two children, four year old and a six year old, approximately? And she dates multiple guys?

The fact that she is a certified psychotherapist, if she is, means that she passed the tests and filled the requirements in a particular institution and with her state. It does not mean that she is mentally healthy; it does not mean that her behavior makes sense or is functional. Plenty of certified psychotherapists are dysfunctional in their own lives. Many are not effective in their treatment of clients.

You wrote that you helped her financially, $10,000 total. This is a significant ingredient in the relationship, maybe in her motivation to be in it.

Probably a good idea for you to move on. I see no point in not moving on, at least intending to move on.

anita