E
Never assume or count on that the other person is going to change or that you can “make” him to so. Plus “if you really love me then you would do this for me” is highly manipulative. In my experience, people who love is because the *other* accepts them for who they are, not to change themselves for the other. If any real change is going to happen, he will have to want to do it for his own reasons and internal motivation.
I am a student of how habits are formed and changed. This is a habit, learned behavior. Like any habit, it will take someone to make a concerted and prolonged effort to change.
It’s like saying that you want to lose weight. Occasional dieting or exercise will not change things in the long run. Having someone nag you to do that will not make any lasting changes.
Frankly I would find it exhausting to monitor his behavior whenever I am out with someone like him.
Mark
Though I run this site, it is not mine. It's ours. It's not about me. It's about us. Your stories and your wisdom are just as meaningful as mine. 