Hi Katie,

I can relate to this a lot actually. There was a guy that I was with long-distance, but he had a lot of problems – like addiction. For some reason I saw the best in him because I’m a spiritual person and I believed that everyone was good deep down. I saw some darker sides to him though, and he once shouted at me for wearing makeup, and some other things. It’s taken me a long time to come to terms with the fact that he is actually not a nice person. His dad also the same as your exes father too. I think it comes from a lack of respect for woman, as my ex would often have a go at his mother too. It’s quite awful thinking about it now.

Due to previous things that have happened in my life, I tend to see the best in people even if they are abusive, or not the right person for me. I think the biggest lesson for me to learn is to be able to see myself first, before I see the other person.

Your ex doesn’t sound like a good guy, and it seems like you’ve dealt with enough from him. If he’s going to treat you with such little worth then let him go. You’re here searching for meaning and depth, and you deserve someone who is going to give that back to you in a relationship too.

Cat x