Dear Edd:

You wrote: “I feel sad that I’ve hurt Chloe, that I’ve caused her pain and I have occasional thoughts about … jumping on a plane, go over to the Alps to see Chloe and tell her that everything is going to be okay”- from having read your account, I think you may be projecting your need for Chloe into her, that is, it is you who needs her more than she needs you. Reads to me that she was able to take care of herself well, continuing her climbing while you were not able to join her, find new people, a new job, live her life away from you.

Her very lack of sex drive while living with you adds to my impression that she needs you less than you need her.

I think that a lack of sex drive overall can not be fixed any more than one can force oneself to like eating broccoli as much as someone else.

I wonder if you perceive something in Chloe that you need that you don’t see in Sarah?

anita