Hi Anita

I am very happy  to see you have posted. My self harm is mostly picking on my face, treating it with products who make it exfoliate of burn, also picking with my hands, when I have a wound and I see it, in general doing all the things to not let it heal, I had spots which bled and that didn’t  stop me from leaving it alone. This I believe is called interfering with healing. This led to acne and skin problems 4 times in my life. Other types of self harm, I didn’t do that often but in times of real anger and helplessness I used to beat my hands and legs with my hands, literally with great strength. My body always hurt after that. This was the worst, or I don’t know, maybe skin picking is the worst because it’s more persistent and sneaky, if you understand what I mean. Ripping small parts of skin around my nails.Picking my eyelashes sometimes, but this I really wanted to stop so I control it. I also had the period in my life when I started doing piercings, I only did 4 but it was in period of one month and I couldn’t stand the pain anymore because the pain was long after doing this, for about week or so. The wound and the pain gave me relief. But I didn’t do it anymore, anyway at that time I couldn’t stop myself and I didn’t even understand why I do it. The hair is something I definitely left alone and I will never come back no matter what because if I damage it, it will never heal, needs to grow so I got scared of that. Perhaps there are other ways I harmed myself, those are some I recall.

I’m doing okay, thank you for asking and caring. My mother is at her partner’s house lately, and also spending time with grandma. Recently I try to speak everything just like in this argument about things in the kitchen. I guess it’s better when I say it instead of being quiet.

So I met with this guy, he just left my house. I wasn’t sure about this meeting, I first said yes but then I said I’m not sure. He came here anyway.