Hello anita, Mark and princevaliant,

I’m sorry that I never replied back. I was visiting my parents and then I had a deadline for uni-work. But I still wanted to say thank you for your help.I feel like the exchange with you helped me to come to terms with that failed therapy (or at least I realized that not all of it was my fault).

As for changing my life, I’m still struggling. To be honest, I haven’t made much progress.

I think all of your advice is good. Looking at my past has helped me to see things clearer. But I still don’t understand myself completely. Maybe I should seek another therapist, like my former therapist suggested (I’m still unsure).

But I also need to focus on the present. Too often I distract myself online to not have to face reality. I’m disappointed in myself, but I also often feel like nothing matters to me. At least I try to at least not go online in the mornings and it has worked in the last days. Maybe I should start more slowly like princevaliant suggested.

I hope I can change someday. But thank you for your help again. It’s so nice of you that you took the time to read and reply!