Dear crystal:

In June 2013 (before I knew of and was a member in this website), you started a thread here.

You were then in the tenth grade. You wrote there that “everybody wanted (you) to live up to all those expectations” and you worked very hard to meet their expectations by becoming a “headgirl” in school. Your friends at the time complained that you didn’t have enough time for them.

You wrote: “Even after getting good marks I’m not at all satisfied and I’ve stopped feeling happy. I just feel numb and hollow from the inside. When I smile now days it’s just a formality, it’s not (because) I’m happy… this feeling is killing me.”

Almost five years later, here on this thread, you wrote: “I have, on many occasions, been called Ice Queen” and you wrote: “The other day a friend of mine.. told me that I have a heart that’s very strong, so comparable to cement that it doesn’t know how to beat”

Reads to me that the “numb and hollow from the inside”,  brought about the Ice Queen and heart of cement images of you in others’ minds, and that it has been going on for almost five years, probably longer.

This numbness may very well have to do with “all those expectations” placed on you… by your parents?

anita