Hi Chris,

I hope you are having a better day today and are not feeling as lonely. I can relate because I l know how it feel alone with little support  network.

In terms of the girl, my advice (and I am a woman so perhaps a guy would have better advice here) would literally just to be to go up and talk to her in her shift and ask if she 2anted to meet for coffee or something. It sounds like you have made lots of moves e.g. giving her your number and writing her a note which she hasn’t really reciprocated. Did you guys know each other before? E.g. when she expressed frustration you hadn’ asked her out, how close were you then? Had how long ago was That? It sounds like you need to get the ball rolling and find out her feelings toward you- if she is looking to get together then Great, then if not at least you know and can move on, rather than waiting on her as it sounds like this has been going on a while but not getting that far. Also there is nothing more sexy than confidence- so just going up there and taking to her she will appreciate that as being brave.

If it turns out nothing happens with this girl, tthats Okay, it isn’t about you, it’s about her so please don’t take it if she doesn’t reciprocate as a rejection. It could be because you aren’t her type (something we have no control over), she isn’t looking for a relationship, she isn’t in the right frame of mind/stage of life. I have seen it lots of times where people who youd think look perfect together don’t get together due to the timing not being right for them to be together e.g. different maturity levels or life paths or just one of them just not being ready for a relationship- so basically if she says no, it’s not personal.

I am a big believer in fate (which I think helps with things like this) e.g. if it’ meant to be it’l be, if not it won’t and that’s just life.

You also said you don’t have much family or friends. Perhaps you should try and join a club to do a hobby that you like or take a educational course and you could meet friends (male and female there). If you do try this, please don’t be disheartened if you join a course/club and don’t find anyone you connect with, that’s Okay, you may find someone you do another club/event. That’s just a note speaking from experience.

You could perhaps download podcasts from the radio of shows you like so you feel more connected to the world. I find books are also good (but it depends if you like reading). There is a book i would recommend called ‘the opposite of lonliness’ about a girl graduating from Harvard and her feelings of belonging vs loneliness- but books are quite a personal thing so it’s up to you.

The last thing I would say is that everyone feels lonely so in that you are not alone. Even people in relationships. Even people with kids. Everyone is looking for the connection you are searching for and sometimes you find it at certain parts of your life and sometimes you don’t. Right now you haven’t found it but I bet you have had that feeling in the past so, like in the past, it will come back.

I I hope you get on well with the girl. Take good care of yourself.