Hiya,

Thanks for your responses.

I actually do think I am good at being in the present, it’s more that I often don’t feel happy with it. I find working on my arts and crafts gives me a level of grounding. I mostly do feel in control, this is something that’s really important to me. It’s one of the reasons I had to leave a very controlling corporate job.

That’s interesting re. having goals beyond the now.. I don’t. I do have dreams but that is just what they are- they change all of the time. I’ve not followed any kind of plan in a really long time. Even with buying my house, I hadn’t planned to, it was a spontaneous decision because I needed to escape the living situation I was in at the time. So.. I guess this is why earning and spending money and time feels a bit worthless.. because what am I doing it for/ what’s it leading to?

I am very independent, I don’t like to rely on anybody for anything, however I find it is difficult to make plans for just yourself, without anyone else involved i.e. long term goals. I do love the idea of running craft workshops, perhaps owning a studio however I can’t see how it could work when I feel so unsettled/ find it difficult to stay still long enough to really grow anything?