Yes Anita,  i think it traces back to my childhood, my dad left me when i was 10 months old, mom passed away at 19, the only family i have left is my grandma and shes not in the same country as me. This week ive been trying to ‘let go’ of the past, like my childhood and learn to forgive, i think this is the only way to heal myself.

Today has been very tough, my ex msged me to discuss matter that needed to be done (we rented an apartment together and we are ending the lease). i feel like i was doing so well, until he contacted me, hearing from him just give me hope, and i dont want that hope, coz the hope of getting together will delay my healing. Today is one of those days i feel really stuck.