Ben,

This is very much the case. I know in a way that I am nothing like that person, as I approached them (in a non-threatening and malicious way) and they seemed to have absolutely no remorse, and even acted smug about it. However, the feelings of hypocrisy that I’m struggling to shake come from just having this done to me and now I have partaken in doing this to somebody else.

That is definitely another way of seeing it. Actually, I do have a lot of hang-ups on past mistakes. Many of these are from alcohol, but for every drunk mistake, I’m sure I have a sober one, too.

Self-forgiveness is something that I very much struggle to do. I am so set on only ever doing good things that maybe this is harming me in the way that I am setting too high a standard for myself and, in turn, beating myself up when I can’t reach this standard.

I dip in and out of self-care. Once I feel better I feel cured and stop practicing it. I realise now that I need to be more constant with it, even when I’m feeling good anyway.

Thank you so much.