Brav3, i just read this post.  I feel like i can relate in so many ways.  I have gone through a similar situation.  Been over a year now for me since she left me.  Unfortunately i’m still struggling on a daily basis.  It was very nice to read this though.  I’m going to read it again and hopefully it will help me some.  I still have bad days and breakdown and cry.  But I am healing (I think).  I read something about you forgiving yourself, I haven’t yet.  And also about being pathetic and letting her walk all over you, putting your life aside to satisfy her needs.  I did the same thing.  Shame is huge.  I am just glad we don’t live in the same town.  I don’t think i could handle seeing her laugh and be happy.  You are a strong man.  Keep up the good work.  Hopefully I can get to where you are someday.  Thanks again for your posts…