I doubt its a commitment issue to her , shes my first long term relationship and i have always searched for that one woman to stick with , but it may be a commitment issue overall .

You see ,  she made me a better person , before her i was always cutting my workouts , my diets , my everything basically .

She gave me motivation to do all those stuff , and now when we both got into basically a “choose what you want to be” road instead of a guideline wrote to us by other people (Army is a must over here) i was happy enough with her and had no need to search for a job faster or whatever , and recently noticed that i was slacking in food and workouts whenever i wasnt with her and gave myself a hard time “Cant you be motivated without her on your side ? ” now i know i love her , its like were meant to eachother , but it might be that after the whole after the army-before the trip – after the trip excitement ended and i got into a bad routine she started to bore me too ? , and im afraid that fixing my own life wont bring the joy back with her .

I know that staying in this situation wont the relationship aswell but its hard keeping your shit together when the most important thing in your life starts dying because of you .

And maybe im overreacting and its just a phase in a relationship ? i already read enough information to know feelings subside and love is more of a choice but it freaks me out that i cant “feel” my love to her .

My life changed alot , ive built up a name in the army and now after finishing my duty , doing my trip and coming back things have gotten , well , less exciting ? but she gave me all the excitement i needed up until 3 weeks ago when i started doubting my feelings . i know i have to get a job and start working on other aspects in my life without worrying about her but its so hard !

3 Months before i finished the army i had the exact same urges without a reason , so i went to doctors and they found nothing , and it all vanished a day after i was out of the army , that was shocking and terrifying , i didnt even think it was related ! .

maybe im just afraid of changes , in me , in my relationship and  life in general ? .

I know relationships are not an easy task but why cant i accept that and start working on it ? it was just so easy beforehand .

I never stopped telling myself that i love her , i ever did a pros and cons of her and found out that all the negatives i named  ive learned to like them , or atleast accept them .