Dear Kay:

Let’s look what happened with the second guy, CX. You did operate way better with him, there was a lot  of texting before meeting him in person, lots of conversations and the couple of dates took place in public places.  He said the right things “it was ok, that I was a good woman and that sex was just a part of a relationship but not the whole thing. He also said that he really would like to have a serious relationship with me”. Reads like a decent guy so far.

“and then he just disappeared and stopped replying to  me at all”, and your assumption is that he disappeared because he found out that you are sexually inexperienced. Then, based on this assumption, you came up with a solution, to hookup with guys and become sexually experienced.

But what if your assumption is incorrect: maybe he even liked the fact that you are sexually inexperienced but he didn’t like something else about you? And based  on the wrong assumption you will be fixing a problem that was not at all a problem with him…

When a person, CX for one, is on an  online dating site, it is not likely that you  were the only woman he communicated with or went on a date  with. There were others and so, you had competition. In that competition, you were dropped. Maybe he was attracted to a different woman because she has  a better paying job than you do, or she lives closer or.. some reason, I don’t know the reason and I think you don’t either.

What do you think?

anita