Dear Alia:

You are welcome and I appreciate you coming back to your thread to thank me.

I have another point to make regarding what can be learned from this short relationship:

You wrote: “we had instant chemistry/ a spark, we were both attracted to each other, had similar tastes/ interests, and shared some personal details about out lives… In the 6th week, he became less responsive and stopped initiating texts”. A few days later he messaged you that “he just wanted something casual”, and “isn’t ready to date”.

What this teaches me is that the following are not dependable indicators that a relationship will last two months: instant chemistry/spark (there is was, gone in the 6th week), similar tastes and interests and sharing personal details about each other’s life.

Better resist the chemistry and spark and get to know a man while not being sexually involved with him, for at least 6 weeks. After six weeks or so, evaluate: are we still motivated to see each other, are we still sharing about our lives, listening to each other with interest, wanting to know more? Are we enjoying our shared tastes and interests, by let’s say hiking together, if hiking is a shared interest. Then take it from there.

You don’t want a guy to tell you he wants “something casual” and is not ready to date after having sex with him. Better find that out before.

Post again anytime. I will be glad to read from you and reply again.

anita