Hi Shelbyville,

Thank you for responding and being there for me! I agree with you that he’s messed up in the head and that he is figuring things out right now and it’s not a good time to be in a relationship, I think he’s trying to see how it affects me by still trying to include me in larger events, but not realizing that I find out about all the other stuff too. I wish he would just mature and grow up and work on himself, but one can only hope. It seems that things have settled down for him a bit, (i’m not sure if he’s on or off dating sites) but he’s spending more time alone from what I can tell as our friends have gotten busier.

The hardest part for me is hoping that he will reach out and he will message me and update me on his life and where he is at. I know that this is out of my control, but everyday goes by and i have the same hope that maybe today i’ll hear from him.

I’m also still feeling blue, crying often but going about my day and doing activities while feeling lonely and alone. I am having a hard time not judging myself for wanting to be with someone who so clearly doesn’t want me and isn’t being respectful to me.