Hey Emily,

What you’re experiencing is very difficult to deal with, I know. I’ve dealt with this since May of 2017. I don’t know how or why it came to be in my life or into yours but it seems like there are many people who suffer from this. It’s called depersonalization and it basically just makes you feel like you aren’t existing. I know its scary as hell but I’ll tell you whats helped me deal with it over the past couple of years.

Try not to think about it. I know that sounds very counter-intuitive but anxiety causes anxiety and the more you allow yourself to think about it, the more likely it is to happen. Just accept it as a part of who you are and not necessarily a “scary thing”. Also, the triggers can be more physical than you may think. For me, when I’m in a very brightly lit room I notice all the details which makes me hyper-aware of my situation, which can cause me to feel that way. Don’t be afraid to talk to your close family about it even though they probably won’t understand what you mean.

Bottom line is, you will be okay. No feeling is final. God has chosen to place this obstacle in some of our lives and in some ways I see it as a blessing. For instance, if I never would have gone through this then I could never have helped (well I hope I helped) some person who I don’t even know. You are alive and you are okay. Life is weird and how life came to be can freak the hell out of some people but sometimes its best to just accept that we’re all here, regardless of how we got here.

I kind of rambled but I hope I helped you in some way. If you have any specific questions on how to deal with this or any other comments, let me know in a reply.

Thanks 🙂

-G