Hi Jaquetta.

A couple of things here I think. From the legal problem itself posted, seems like a lot of similar issues we’ve had in dealing with flats we rent out. Councils are notoriously slow and bureaucratic – it’s highly unlikely this was any kind of attempt of professional misconduct in your name – more a simple mistake that just needs clearing up which will take some time to do but will get there. Honestly, we’ve had situations where we have apparently had a CCJ against us for debt on a flat in a building we didn’t even actually own. It is seriously shocking what happens in the nature of business mistakes.

Where I think you are really struggling with though is two-fold. One, in allowing yourself to deal with the fact you made a mistake. It happens. It will always happen. What matters is how you deal with it – both for yourself and in the example you want to set for your children. E.g. why are you now allowing your husband to step in and sort this out – would it not be a stronger example to be able to say, yes, I made a mistake, it is ok and here I am sorting it out.  Likewise – the second thing – using this experience to practice overcoming your nature of catastrophising such events, problems. Logically knowing and emotionally feeling are different – it is in facing issues and dealing with them as best we can – understanding what we can and can’t impact and only worrying about the things that we can do something about – that’s the life skills you want to teach your children I think?