Michelle,

I’m glad I made you giggle a little.

Yes, I do think it’s extremely important that the closest person to you will also be the one who holds your hand through tough times! You’re so lucky to have someone like that by your side – funnily enough, he was exactly that for me before all this, I was so sure I would’ve had my arms and legs cut off to prove a point if I had to! Until he failed me for the first time and since then it’s juat been like a coming out experience of who he really is/ who he has become – I can’t quite figure out whether it’s possible that I was so blindsighted by him for so many years prior to everything, whether he maintained a mask on for that many years (sounds exhausting if you ask me) or whether the experiences throughout the summer simply changed who he is as a person today.

I’m not even going to say time will tell anything because time has been telling me nothing but negative things about him… in all honesty, I kinda wish I didn’t love him anymore. Because I don’t know if I like who he is anymore. It’s the love that’s kept me holding on for so long. It’s the love that we share and who he was prior to everything because he was hands down incredible. I was so thankful for him everyday and really genuinely thought I was one of the lucky ones to have such an honest, genuine, caring man by my side. It’s extremely difficult to let go of that as I try to figure out why the change and who he really is right now.

I can imagine it’s different being back home, boring UK, terrible weather! You’ll soon get used to it again! Any more trips planned anytime soon?