Ok but I am in deep pain and depression right now. How can I begin anything?

I feel badly. I usually can give myself what I need. But today I don’t know what that is. My thoughts are racing and negative.

i wish my apartment was available!

I am in a hostel like air bnb it is bad I think it triggered me

i keep trying to do the right thing and am making weird decisions

whay should I do for ten days?

It seems like forever

and even then what if I can’t afford rent? One day ad get evicted. Everything is so scary right now!