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Reply To: Self Trust and More

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#306059
Anonymous
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Dear Cali Chica:

It is clear to me that at this point you need to show your husband that you are very serious about no longer lashing out at him by doing something different, something you didn’t do before, be it taking mood stabilizers and/ or attending psychotherapy. Your Word and intent are not good enough in this regard.

I just took out my folders, I will type “NOTES” every time I copy from my notes. Everything that follows NOTES is writings that were given to me by my therapist 2011-2013, as handouts or as recordings (none of it is my writings or comments). I have the notes on paper, so the copying is reading and typing. I will start with a poem that meant so much to me, you can find it online, but I will type it here for you just as it appears in my notes (it is all about the practice of Mindfulness). Feel free to respond to any and all.

NOTES: Hokusai says (by Roger Keyes)

Hokusai says Look carefully

He says pay attention, notice.

He says keep looking, stay curious.

He says there is no end to seeing.

 

He says Look Forward to getting old.

He says keep changing,

you  just get more who you really are.

He says get stuck, accept it, repeat yourself

as long as it’s interesting.

 

He says keep doing what you love.

He says keep praying.

He says every one of us is a child,

every one of us is ancient,

every one of us has a body,

He says every one of us is frightened.

He says every one of us has to find a way to live with fear.

 

He says everything is alive-

shells, buildings, people, fish, mountains, trees,

Wood is alive.

Water is alive.

Everything has its own life.

Everything lives inside us.

He says live with the world inside you.

 

He says it doesn’t matter if you draw, or write books.

It doesn’t matter if you saw wood, or catch fish.

It doesn’t matter if you sit at home

and stare at the ants on the verandah or the shadows of the trees

and grasses in your garden.

 

It matters that you care.

It matters that you feel.

It matters that you notice.

It matters that life lives through you.

 

Contentment is life living through you.

Joy is life living through you.

Satisfaction and strength

are life living through you.

peace is life living through you.

 

He says don’t be afraid.

Don’t be afraid.

Look, feel, let life take you by the hand.

Let life live through you.