I’m trying to view it that way but its hard. My Ex always used to chastise me for worrying about the future or assuming that something would go wrong. Then when It did, I at least felt a bit prepared for it. I guess I couldn’t have prepared for her coming out and then leaving me.

Just not sure what accepting that looks like yet. Just have to say ‘better luck next time’ I guess ?

I keep thinking that I want stepping stones or markers out of this thing. I told myself and others that i needed to meet up with her to have a sort of letting go ritual. So that I could almost get permission from her to let go. (This was when we met for a drink and chat 3 months ago, she told me she had already had a fling and slept with a random woman and was doing all these new life things). When we would have celebrated our anniversary I took some old photos and what i had been writing down the last few months and a letter I wrote her to the park and burnt them up. Now I’m looking for the next stepping stone out. But I think I’m just kidding myself with all of that. She clearly doesn’t need anything, she just moved on without looking back it seems.