Dear Natalija:

This very morning (it is morning here, US), right before waking up, I dreamed about a mistake I made long ago,  one that ended in my loss of thousands of dollars, having trusted someone untrustworthy with some information. I felt lots of pain at the time and this morning there was a dull ache of regret where once the pain was acute.

Reading your recent post, regarding the job in Ireland (which you mentioned earlier)- reads to me clearly that it would be a mistake on your part to not go to Ireland, and instead, to stay in the relationship with this man. Wouldn’t it be nice if you don’t wake up one morning with this dull ache of regret???

About him treating you as respectfully as he has been treating you- what if he treats you this way because he has nothing else to offer you- I mean, why would a woman be in a relationship with a him living with a wife and children, keeping the relationship secret for 13 years, if in addition to this he treats her disrespectfully?

He has to bring something attractive into a relationship in these unfavorable circumstances, and that something may very well be the way he looks at you, the words he tells you, the small gestures he makes to you.

anita