Word. I think we are all still working through some avoidance tendencies. I struggle myself with knowing what I need & then knowing what I want & those not always matching up but trying to align those things with my values. I’ve been leaning more in my needs even though I feel like I don’t “want it” sometimes but I do it because I know I need it. Like spoon feeding a baby vegetables.

My TF has said something very similar about music . Though they are a woman, they have challenges with expressing emotions & intimacy as well. Not sure how or why that happened.. I’m thinking they’re a bit in denial about some childhood violence , or they had too much structure & not enough nurture or something. I actually… though I love them, no longer care to figure it out. But I thought it was interesting that my TF struggles with expressing those things when generally those are things women usually where on their sleeves . I’m a gender and sexuality advocate so when I first learned about TF and one having to be the masculine & the other the feminine I initially didn’t like that. Many took that as only men and women. Later I learned it can be same gender.. it was confusing at first still . I’m a woman but I’m masculine presenting , I’m also masculine energetically in the outside world and work field – hard worker, go getter , goal setter/ leader . Internally I’m very feminine though , and in the home behind closed doors I’m still assertive but I’m actually very feminine and nurturing. I’ll cook & take care of those I love. Up until I met my TF , I was all the way in my masculine, both outside and inside because I didn’t find partners who understood or complimented my energy very well. I had to be masculine through and through . (Which is why I ran first.. lol) Then I met my TF who was feminine on the surface but pretty masculine internally . But also very balanced. Like we both could step up or step back naturally as needed. After meeting them I embraced my feminine side. And realized my TF was pretty masculine. Which is natural to them but I also know a large part of their problem is rejecting their Divine feminine. They have to embrace their feminine in order to open up spiritual /emotional/mental/physical blocks. I don’t know why they have blocks but a while ago my intuition told me they may have mother issues. Like their mom neglected to protect them or be there consistently or when they really needed or something. I personally tend to refrain from dating women with mom issues as I know ppl tend to gravitate me because of my nurturing nature . But when they haven’t resolved their mom issues I become a emotional & spiritual punching bag to them..