Hi Michelle,
It’s OK to hate dead people. I hated my father. When he died, he left such a mess for everyone, I still hated him. His name should have been Chaos.
Well guess what? It’s a year later, and now I’m just mad at him. I don’t hate him. Could you imagine what pain someone must be in to be a total lifelong screwup? But I am mad at him.
Next year, if I’m lucky, I’ll feel nothing.
Later, in my middle age, I might like him again.
When I’m old, maybe I’ll love the father he was when times were good.
What I’m saying is don’t feel guilty. Hate away. Scream at the heavens. Scream down to hell. Curse that blasted woman who HAD TO (just HAD to!) tell you about her pregnancy supposedly with YOUR dead husband! Go online and get those good old fashioned hoo doo curse candles. The whole nine yards. It will make you feel better letting all that JUSTIFIED anger OUT!
Remember, no guilt! Anger is a porthole. You have to go through it to get out of it. Suppress it and that’s when people get things like cancer.
Best,
Inky
Though I run this site, it is not mine. It's ours. It's not about me. It's about us. Your stories and your wisdom are just as meaningful as mine. 